I love my job. I just finished a coaching call with a client of mine (he’s a wealth manager handling tax and investment matters) who has made a profound shift in his life. He shared with me a story about approaching a very significant investor to invite the client to come and talk with him about his retirement portfolio. My client was very happy with himself for doing that and it was something he expected to do more often in the future.
I asked my client what shift he had made that had allowed him to do that. He struggled with the labeling on that shift. Sometimes it can be difficult to put our fingers on what exactly has changed in our awareness or in our mental makeup that has enabled a new way of being for ourselves. Doing so and giving that shift a name can help it stick and make it more lasting. He talked me through what was different and the response was rather lengthy. In essence, he was thinking out loud. The description was wordy and useful in terms of processing for him, but it didn’t create clarity for either of us. Finally, I asked him to put it in a nutshell of 8 words or less to define the shift. His answer: “I’m not judging myself anymore.”
What a relief that was! Once he said that, there was the kind of giddy laughter that comes from a huge release of pressure. The man was experiencing a new sense of freedom and I was thrilled to be there to see it happen. What’s next for him, I wonder? He plans to follow up on opportunities much more than he ever has. I suspect that will only be the beginning point to what happens for him as a result of this new shift of not judging himself anymore.
So, I wonder… What has happened for you when you’ve let go of judging yourself? And, if judgment still has a strong hold on your life, what do you think might happen for you if you were to stop judging yourself?